Ain't Nobody Got Time for Dat

I has come to my attention that there are few of you who expect a blog update at some point on Thursday. And while I am flattered, this is also a bit surprising. Mostly because I didn't realize I was quite so predictable. (I work from home on Thursday mornings, and also it's the "end" of my editing week as I get new manuscripts on Friday, so I typically don't have manuscripts to edit. So there's a reason I tend to blog on Thursday morning.) But I'm also surprised because this blog is really more about my therapy than it is about writing for an actual reader. Although it's wonderful writing practice just now when I can't seem to get it together enough to finish my six-years-in-progress novel. But that's another blog post.

So I guess I missed my therapy appointment yesterday. It's not that I'm not puzzling over a LOT  of ideas, it's just that this seemed like a really busy week. I don't know that it WAS especially busy, in terms of having a lot to do, but it felt like that. And I don't like feeling busy. I'm sort of a recovering addict in that way. I used to crave busyness. I wore it as a badge of honor. "Look at me, I'm so busy doing so many busy things. How do I possibly manage, you ask? Well, really, I'm just clearly a superior human being, that's all." But like any recovering addict I had to hit rock bottom, have a bit of a come to Jesus moment, and go stone cold sober.

"Hi, I'm Kristi and I'm a busy-holic." "Hi, Kristi!"

Paul doesn't manage well when we're busy. (And we have a teenager who can't yet drive. You know who's busy? High schoolers are busy!) He marches to his own drummer, and when we're rushing out the door he feels out of control. So then he starts dragging and/or asserting control, which adds to the frustration and chaos, and suddenly no one's happy or connecting.

Someone really smart (it was either Dr. Karen Purvis or Dr. Gregory Keck or maybe Melissa Faye Greene) once wrote, "We have to adapt our lives to the children we adopt." Meaning we can't attachment parent effectively from the front seat of the car or engrossed in email. Paul needs to play in order to learn, to connect, and honestly, I have a hard time playing when I feel busy.

So today I'm taking it slow. Winding down. Centering myself. I took a yoga class this morning. (And oh, my HAMSTRINGS! It kicked my butt! Yoga always looked so easy to me - why waste precious exercise time standing on one leg? But every muscle in my body was quivering. Yet it all felt so peaceful. Who knew?) I carved out time to pray. The bathrooms need cleaning and the floors mopped before our overnight guest arrives. I may make time for that. Or not. I'm trying to put peaceful rhythm to my day so that when Paul and Sam come home (after playdate and practice, so I have even more alone time!) I'm rested and ready to connect.

There are topics I want to blog about, such as "Why I Quit Time-Outs" and "Do You Need Therapy?" and "What If My Nose Was an Airplane and Other Questions that Make Mummy's Head Hurt." But not today. Today I'm going to make myself a cup of hot water and pretend it's tea, read a bit more of Dr. Siegel's The Whole Brain Child (fabulous!), edit a couple of stories, edit a bit of my own story, take a bath, and wait for my lovelies to come home. I may not get everything on the to do list done. (I may, in fact, toss out the to do list.) Every email may not get returned. Progress reports may not get written. I may disappoint someone who is waiting for an "immediate response." But that's OK. Today I'm going to try to focus on the important rather than on the urgent.

Here's one of my lovelies "stuck" in my phone. Reminds me to put email away and pay attention to little man.

"So much time and so little to do. Wait a minute. Strike that. Reverse it." --Willy Wonka